There is something special about watching your children develop personal relationships with extended members of your family.
And it is another notch of pride that develops when you witness your children become their own people, with their own relationships, with the opportunity to create their own memories.
My family and extended family has always been an integral part of my life, and when I became a mother, I wanted my children to experience the same wholeness of family relationships, that I was fortunate enough to have myself. It was important to me, that my children knew that outside of the four-walls of our home, there are extended members of our family, that care for them and are eager to see them succeed. Family who will always be there for them- for the celebrations and the hardships. Family who only ever want the best for them.
I hold so much gratitude and feel beyond blessed, that my children have had the opportunity to develop their own relationships with our extended family. There was a point in time, when my youngest, Hudson, wouldn't connect with other family members- I'd like to blame that on the fact that he was born during a pandemic, and for most of his first year of life, remained disconnected from others- friends and family alike. It was a hard transition, getting him adjusted to others, but I knew he would prosper- he is so loved.
For so long, it had just been the four of us- our new baby, Finley our then toddler, and of course myself and my husband. This was all our 2020 baby; had known in these initial months earth-side and I couldn't blame his hesitation to openly welcome anyone new. Even as we slowly started to attend more family outings and were able to visit our extended family, it still took time. My son remained naturally reserved and has just recently, at two and a half, started opening up to our loved ones. Hudson was one to cry anytime someone unfamiliar came around and he'd often cling to me or his dad, whenever confronted with someone outside out family of four. It took a lot to get him to crack a smile or warm up to someone new- something that was oftentimes understood, but was still hard to bear witness to, when his older brother was eager and willing to welcome any loved one into his heart. But I also had to understand that just like everything else, with a growing child, his ability to bond with others would take time and needed to be nurtured.
It wasn't until, as of late, that he started gravitating towards other family members, playing with his cousins, and laughing hysterically with his Grandma Shit (great-grandmother). He started offering out hugs to all the faces that had once sent him into hysterical crying.
And it is just another thing that makes me proud to be a mother- witnessing Hudson become his own person, with relationships and opportunities to create his own memories, with our loved ones.TThe engagement Hudson has with other family members, now, is so comforting to witness- and a privilege for all. I am proud that he has begun to develop such special relationships with his great-grandmother, great-aunts and uncles, cousins, and other extended family who have made an effort to be a part of his life.
It is comforting to feel reassured that my husband and I have created an environment for him, to develop those family relationships, at his own pace and timing. We have made the effort and put in the time, to have him around those who love him and who are eager to maintain their blossoming relationships as well.
While he is forming these close relationships, I have to admit, that there is a lot of joy in being fortunate enough to have family members that genuinely care about him and his brother and make the effort to have close relationships with them. These relationships, outside of myself and their dad, are the ones that will help to shape them and their childhood. They will contribute to their values and beliefs, their understandings of life and memories that will last them a lifetime.
What they say about raising children is true- it takes a village.
XO, Kelleen
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