I have always considered myself to be an open book, but have more recently found that, I follow a more discreet way of life when moving with caution or uncertainty. I have always respected and admired those who shared freely and lived as if the judgements and thoughts of others were merely leaves in the wind. As I look inward and prioritize self-improvement and growth, I have enjoyed learning about the power of vulnerability and sharing when I feel as if it is helpful.
New beginnings and endings, successes and failures, uncertainties and accomplishments, and everything in between, seems to be shared commonly upon social media, within social gatherings, during phone calls and in break rooms. Although the opportunity presents itself often, not everyone feels obligated or feels as if it is their duty, to be an open book when in the presence of others. And as I navigate such mannerisms, I believe that there is wisdom and grace within silence.
It goes without saying, but it is important that it is notated, that no one is entitled to every thought you have. Although Facebook and similar social media platforms instigate each post with a “what’s on your mind” tag line, you have full ownership of your business and your business only. The sentiment is always coupled with discretions that should be shared, especially when it adversely or significantly affects another, but nonetheless, there are parts of our journey that should be treasured and treated as if sacred. There are parts that you find yourself still managing and discovering, and there is almost always, a time and place, but that time and place may not be now.
It would be naïve to believe that are not any decisions or events that we want the world to know about. There are oftentimes things that we would rather endure alongside of others, rather than endure on our own. Although, it is imperative that we get our bearings and decipher what we need, prior to involving the voices and opinions, thoughts, and judgments, of others. It is imperative, as we navigate life, that you have one or a few, accountability companions that you trust whole-heartedly, but sometimes putting all your lives wishes and plans on blast, can cause distraction. There will always be people checking in on your progress, asking questions and voicing their doubts, fears, or skepticisms, whether intentionally creating distraction or what have you, or not.
Along your journey, there will be various times where it is make it or break it, where you need to put your head down and grind it out! There will be times when you know that others may not understand and agree with the decisions you are making, and there will be times when you aren’t moving in clarity. When you move in silence, you are actively choosing to keep your process and that part of your journey, uninhabited by outside noise. You are moving alongside of yourself, God, and the few that you trust. You have the right, and you should ensure you use it- change your mind when warranted, pray before it, through it, and after it, contemplate every avenue, strategize and visualize each possible outcome, and execute without distraction!
We have all been witness to (or even been a victim of) that couple on social media, two weeks after meeting, the status of their relationship changes... then a couple weeks later it's now complicated or even separated. Give it a couple more weeks, and they are back on the prowl with a big, red, single status. Inevitably, there are some who find joy in others' challenges and mishaps... All this to say, when you're sharing, posting, and broadcasting your life and it's plans, essentially for validation (or even vanity), it is important, that we keep in mind that every "like" may not indicate genuine support. It is unfortunate that everyone won't always have the best intention or well wishes for you, and rather sit salivating at the possibility of your public failure. The fact may be much less important to some than others, but is always worth considering prior to sharing publicly.
Maybe it is the girl in me, but I always assume that people who are quick to gossip about others to me, are just as quick to gossip about me. Those who never take a moment to pause and think before speaking can find themselves to be detrimental to themselves and others. It is good practice to learn to listen and observe first- always. Silent spaces do not always need to be filled with noise. Wisdom has shown us what should be safeguarded and what should be put on display, and everything doesn't need to be stated publicly.
You may be thinking, Kelleen, what an interesting topic to discuss today.
And yeah, I mean I would be the first to admit that there have been times I have shared publicly what should have been left private, and Facebook memories is always quick to humble me in that aspect. But as I have grown, and experienced more of life, I have a compound love for consideration before posting, sharing, or discussing. Discernment is the key to knowing when silence is the best strategy or screaming to the mountain tops is the better direction. I will leave this with, there is a certain level of peace and serenity in silence, in knowing for yourself and within yourself first.
Cheers babes!
Happy Friday!!
XO, Kelleen
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